No Air
by Lyra Malfoy42
Summary: Songfic Bella can't breath without him near her. “Bella glanced out of her window, It was a dark night. She turned on the radio in her bedroom. Music filled the silence, for which she was glad.”


**Summary: (Songfic) Bella can't breath without him near her. "Bella glanced out of her window, It was a dark night. She turned on the radio in her bedroom. Music filled the silence, for which she was glad."**

**AN I was inspired by some rather good songfics that I've been reading recently, so I decided to try my hand at one. This just seemed to fit Bella's state of mind after Edward left her perfectly, so I'm probably not the first to use this song.**

**Disclaimer : The characters of Twilight do not belong to me, neither does the song "No Air" performed by Jordin Sparks and Chris Brown.**

-

_Tell me how I'm supposed to breathe with no air_

Bella glanced out of her window, It was a dark night. She turned on the radio in her bedroom. Music filled the dreadful silence, for which she was glad.

_If I should die before I wake  
It's 'cause you took my breath away  
Losing you is like living in a world with no air  
Oh_

She had changed her mind, this was a painful song to listen to, it was just so truthful, too truthful. Her heart longed for him, as her lungs longed for air. She longed for his scent to fill her senses, for his deep, golden eyes to look into plain, brown ones.

_  
I'm here alone, didn't wanna leave  
My heart won't move, it's incomplete  
Wish there was a way that I can make you understand_

Why did he have to go? It just wasn't fair, 'but then, life isn't fair' she reasoned to herself.

_  
But how do you expect me  
to live alone with just me  
'Cause my world revolves around you  
It's so hard for me to breathe_

She wanted to him there, she had become so accustomed to it. Him, Edward, being with her, that she didn't want to accept that he might never be near her again.

_Tell me how I'm supposed to breathe with no air  
Can't live, can't breathe with no air  
It's how I feel whenever you ain't there  
It's no air, no air_

She felt like being reckless, she didn't care about the danger, she hadn't for a while. She just couldn't live without him.

_  
Got me out here in the water so deep  
Tell me how you gonna be without me  
If you ain't here, I just can't breathe  
It's no air, no air_

But then, what about Charlie? Guilt overtook her powerful emotions, as her thoughts turned to what would happen if Charlie were injured, due to her reckless actions? It would be all her fault, she was being so selfish.

_No air, air  
No air, air  
No air, air  
No air, air_

But then those thoughts were soon forgotten for the moment as the claustrophobia set in, but it wasn't actually claustrophobia, it was almost like the opposite. Who was she trying to kid? It was lack of the drug named Edward Cullen. She was addicted.

_I walked, I ran, I jumped, I flew  
Right off the ground to float to you  
There's no gravity to hold me down for real_

Her mind flew back to when he would pick her up as though she were light as a feather, and then run, holding her, as she clung to him, trusting him with her life. She had hated it at the time, except for the closeness to Edward, it had made her feel nauseous, but now she almost missed it.

_  
But somehow I'm still alive inside  
You took my breath, but I survived  
I don't know how, but I don't even care_

She was just going through the motions, she was sure that people, or at least Charlie had noticed, but she couldn't bring herself to care. Why, how was she still alive?

_So how do you expect me  
to live alone with just me  
'Cause my world revolves around you  
It's so hard for me to breathe_

What cruel person had designed her destiny? To meet him, then tear them apart. He had her heart. When he had been torn from her, he had taken it with him. She wondered if he realised, if he knew what valuable treasure he carried with him. She also wondered if he had left her a memento of his heart. If he would treat hers with the care that she treated his with.

_Tell me how I'm supposed to breathe with no air  
Can't live, can't breathe with no air  
It's how I feel whenever you ain't there  
It's no air, no air_

With a flash of anger she realised that, of course he hadn't, _he_ had cast _her_ off, after all that he'd told her. But then it faded. She could never be angry with him for long, not Edward.

_  
Got me out here in the water so deep  
Tell me how you gonna be without me  
If you ain't here, I just can't breathe  
It's no air, no air_

She sighed. Did she really believe him anyway? Could she really believe that after all that they'd had together, he could just say that and go? Of course he couldn't have. It may have been unhealthy, she may have been in denial, but she couldn't help it. Anything to make her feel closer to him, closer to _her _Edward.

_  
No air, air  
No air, air  
_

She tried to draw another breath, but couldn't, she missed him so. All the strain of the last few weeks, the not eating properly, the fitful, sleepless nights, finally caught up with her. The room began to spin.

_No air, air  
No air, air _

She fainted, falling unconscious onto the bed. Maybe her luck was changing, maybe he would come back for her.

_  
No more  
It's no air, no air_

A pair of deep, but sad, golden eyes gazed through her bedroom window. 'No' he thought to himself, 'I can't endanger her again, she'll get through it eventually'. And with that he turned his head and disappeared off, far into the distance.

-

**AN Did you think it was good? Horrific? Ok?**

**Any constructive criticism? **

**Please tell me, I appreciate any kind of comment about my work, and I want to know what you think of it.**

edit : just descovered I had anonymous reviews turned off, thanks to the person who pmed me about it. Problem is now fixed!


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